Gigs don’t have to be a thing of the past just because you’ve got a dodgy knee. With these tips, you and your knees can easily get through any gig, says Georgia Lewis

I knew it was going to be a massive gamble with my two club feet, arthritic knees and left ankle, but I did it anyway, figuring you’re never too old to be a daft fan. I went to see one of my most favourite ever Australian bands and I’m here to tell you that it was brilliant, but came with a cost.

A friend and I got tickets to their last-ever UK gig at Camden Roundhouse. “Of course I’ll be fine with standing tickets!” I had told myself gaily, forgetting I wasn’t 25 anymore. The next day, my decrepit joints told me otherwise.

I limped out of bed and clung to the bannisters as I descended the stairs like an upright crab. But things could have been worse. I saved myself at least some aggro, largely because of the first two tips in the list below.

So I’m going to share my wisdom with you now, so you can gig with impunity, and not have to crawl down the stairs sobbing the next morning.

7 gig tips for when your heart says yes but your knees say WTF?!

Here are my top tips for gigging when your heart and soul want to rock out, but your bones want to go to bed with a hot water bottle.

1 Comfortable shoes

It seems insane to think about this now, but for many live music fans, a gig is an opportunity to wear shoes that are spike-heeled, platformed, or otherwise bunion-inducing. Come on, people, trainers are the answer. If you can’t walk a mile in your gig shoes without wincing, they are not gig shoes. Save them for a sit-down dinner.

2 Shameless sit-downs

The older I get, the more I appreciate a good sit-down. Even if my ticket says standing and, true to the venue’s word, there is not a seat to be seen. You will still find me sat down if need be. This means finding a discreet spot near the wall and sitting on the floor. I’m likely to say “OOOOF!” as I stand up. Hey, I might need someone to PULL me up. But carefully timed sit-downs provide much-needed respite.

3 Strap up

There is nothing remotely sexy about strapping any joint. No, not that kind, I’m talking about your bone hinges. But a stretchy sock-style bandage will buy my troublesome left ankle a bit more time on the dance floor. Strapping my knees also ensures they will survive the gig AND the public transport odyssey home. I write this as someone whose knees once gave out on the stairs at Pimlico tube station. You don’t want to be doing that.

Read more: Why joints and muscles are stiffer after 50

4 Imminent liniment

A small tube of liniment or ‘brofen gel in your bag is a lifesaver when things start to ache between bangers. Deep Heat will make you smell like a football changing room, so if you’d still rather smell of sweat and ideally whatever scent reminds you of your youth, there are odourless alternatives, such as Voltarol gel.

5 Cool water

Running cold water over your pulse points really does help cool you down, but there are other tricks you can deploy. A little cool water on your achy spots can be an alternative to ice packs. I have been known to soak my socks in cold water at the venue’s sink and pop them back on. The best loos are self-contained cubicles where you can lock the door. Where you can proceed to douse your aching body parts in water from the little sink with impunity.

6 Stick it to the man

If you need a stick for mobility, for Heaven’s sake, take your stick. Gigs are usually crowded, dark, noisy, and full of people who are not fit to operate heavy machinery. Most people won’t even notice if you’ve accessorised with a stick. There are plenty of foldable walking sticks that fit nicely in a bag if you’re not sure if you’ll need one, but don’t want to risk leaving the house without it. And if anyone does give you grief, you’re the one carrying a stick…

7 Acceptance

If you’re not as agile on the dance floor as you used to be, that’s fine. Nobody is at the gig to see you perform, so thrash about as much or as little as you like. If there are seated tickets available and you’re tempted, that’s fine too. Nobody will care if you buy a seated ticket and get involved with a bit of chair dancing.

The fine art of not giving a damn, which comes with the joy of age, means you can go to a gig, take whatever measures you need to take to be comfortable without worrying about what others might think. You’re there to enjoy the show, not impress the crowd.